Letting Go

Today was our last full day with our boy...  :(

So, so, so sad. But we didn't spend it bumming out, we partied it up instead!!

Our sweet friends, the Helgrens, invited us and Dzintars best buddies the Ellis brothers over for some swimming! After Dzintars comment about wanting a "Mario" party for this 15th birthday in October I decided to declare today his official "unbirthday" instead!! Sadly "Mario" party supplies were no where to be found so I chose "Angry Birds" instead and it worked quite nice! I made cupcakes, bought decorations and we sang to him and let him blow out the candles. You couldn't have found a happier boy anywhere on the planet!! After we celebrated him and all that God has done in his life he told me "Stacey, I VERY happy!"

Posing on top of the waterfall quickly turned from this...

to this!!

Happy almost 15th birthday buddy!!

My "angry birds"

Is he adorable or what??

Did I mention the Helgren's pool is AWESOME!!!

Trying to get a good pic of these boys is near impossible, someone is always goofing off! And on a side note, I taught every one of these boys except Dz:) 

He braved the slide even though it dumps into the deep end:) 

We ended our "unbirthday" celebration with a farewell dinner with the Ellis brothers! These boys have been one of the biggest blessings in Dzintars life this summer! He's really going to miss them:(

They sang to him at dinner:) 

Can't blog without including some pics of my princess:)

Nice "photo bomb" honey!!

We are in the final stages of packing. I'll let you know how THAT goes! He's been blessed with so many donated clothes and he wants to take them all. Only problem is he's strictly limited to one suitcase and one backpack and the suitcase can weigh no more than 50 lbs. We're working on it! Yesterday my sweet friend and hairdresser extraordinaire came over with THREE winter coats for him to try on and choose from!! It was like going shopping at home! You should have seen his smile! If you've been reading this blog for awhile you probably already know Dzintars is like ZERO percent body fat and the kid gets cold like nobody's business. We're talking full on goose bumps and shivers with a few drops of water on him. So when he saw those big puffy jackets he was nearly beside himself. With a HUGE smile on his face he says "Stacey, mine no cold in Latvia!" He was seriously stoked!! Laura also brought him some gloves, beanies and sweatshirts to help him stay warm this winter!! He's such a cute little model!!!

With Dzintars departure day looming it's been hard to keep my heart in the moment, the here and now. I'm trying my best not to worry about his future and love him while he's here but still my mind wanders sometimes and I start to worry. I absolutely HATE that he has to leave tomorrow, it just feels wrong. So while I was throwing myself a little pity party in the car yesterday because this hurts! I do not want to let him go, I want to keep him here where I know he is safe and loved. I heard a song by Kari Jobe called "Steady My Heart" that really spoke to all I was wrestling with in that very moment. 

Even when it hurts
Even when it's hard
Even when it all just falls apart
I will run to You
Cause I know that You are
Lover of my soul
Healer of my scars
You steady my heart

 I'm not gonna worry
I know that You got me
Right inside the palm of your hand
Each and every moment
What's good and what gets broken
Happens just the way that You plan

And I will run to You
You're my refuge in Your arms
And I will sing to You
Cause of everything You are

 Then as if that wasn't enough the very next song was this one called "Center of It" by Chris August:

Some nights I lay awake and I
Can’t push these thoughts away
I’m worried where I’m gonna go
Where I’m gonna be are You gonna be there for me
When it feels like the doors are closing
Gotta trust that You’re doing something
Come sun come rainy day
You are all I need

In the dark, in the light
In the morning and night
In the good, in the hurt
In the places I hide
When I rise, when I fall You’ll be there through it all
At the start, at the end
In the center of the center of it

Truth is I'm terribly worried about Dzintars returning to Latvia. And I have no idea what God has planned for him, I only know our hosting him this summer was somehow a part of it all and that his story has impacted and touched people far and wide. And that even as he returns to Latvia and an unknown future God is with him through it all! This summer was only a piece of the puzzle, only a tiny part of the tapestry He is weaving in Dzintars life! So many miraculous and wonderful things have come out of this hosting expereicne, many of which I can't even share, you'll just have to take my word for it! But God is at work my friends and his love for Dzintars is clear!!

Please continue to pray for him as he heads home! He does not want to go, we are the only family he's ever known and he certainly doesn't want this to end! He's begging to stay and it just breaks my heart!! Pray that he'll have a peace about leaving! I keep telling him this is not the end, God has big plans for him, but all he is able to think about is losing the one thing he's always wanted...a family!