Goodbye Sucks!!!!

Sorry, can't hide my feelings, goodbye sucks:( 

It was just plain awful!! 

I was in tears this morning before Dzintars even got out of bed! And now I'm just numb. Before I make everyone cry, let me share a few photos of the parts of our day that didn't include a 14 year old sobbing and begging me not to make him go back to Latvia. 

My sweet husband took Dzintars out to buy me some gifts last night. I got two bouquets of flowers, a balloon that says "I love you" and some precious pieces of jewelry. Dzintars is such a thoughtful kid, he loves watches and picked me out a new one, as well as a bracelet that has the words "faith, hope and love" on it and my favorite piece is a necklace with a "blinged up" letter D for Dzintars:) Today after Peter left for work he asked me to take him out to buy a gift for Peter. We were already picking up pictures at Costco so I took him to the Azusa Target with the shopping cart escalator. I knew he'd get a kick out of it and I was right:) He thought it was super cool so of course I took his picture with it! 

The kids and I took him for one more sweet treat at Twohey's in Alhambra:) He took one bite and declared it "PERFECT!" Ha! That was the first time I'd ever heard him use that word. It was followed by many "yum-yums":) 

Family hugs before driving to the airport. 

We almost scored another night with our boy when American cancelled his flight to JFK. But after a few hours of scrambling by LeAnn the director of New Horizons and some smooth talking at LAX from our local coordinator and Peter we were able to book all the kids and the airline representative on a flight from LAX to Nashville and then to La Guardia, where they'll have to take ground transportation to JFK. Dzintars was very disappointed when the new flight was booked. He told me "Too bad. I thought I was going to get one more night with you. I wish I was your son!" Rip my heart out why don't you kid?

The kids were rock stars!! Didn't get home till after 11 pm and they were just superb!! Small miracles folks, small miracles.

Playing Uno with Victorja and Dan.

One of Brennan's two new Latvian crushes. She's such a cutie. 

The kids both loved Santa.

They'll miss their big brother. Both of them are already asking why he had to go:(

 One final shot as a family of five.

They had their serious faces on tonight. 

Until they started tickling each other.

Right after this picture was taken we had to say our final goodbyes. It was awful!! I knew he was sad and desperately wanted to stay. But I did not expect him to sob and cling to me with everything he had begging me not to make him go:( We had to pry him off of me and nearly shove him up the escalator away from us.  It was devastating. My heart hurts for this boy, for the loss he is feeling and the fact that all he's ever wanted is a family of his own. We will do our best to love him well from here but he NEEDS a family! These next days will be hard for us all, please keep all five of us in your prayers as we mourn the fact that we're no longer together and continue to pray for a family for Dzintars!! I desperately want to tell him he has a family coming just for him!! He's had a few families seriously inquire about him but none of them will be able to proceed. There is a minimum age gap between parent and child of 18 years, that alone has "disqualified" two possible families today alone and another one last week. I know there is a family out there searching for Dzintars, they just don't know it yet! Please, continue to share his story. You never know when your one "share" will reach the family that was meant to be his all along!!